"She wasn’t exactly sure when it happened. Or even when it started. All she knew for sure was that right here and now, she was falling hard and she could only pray that he was feeling the same way."
-Nicholas Sparks
-
Okay--Chuck's friends were the worst. They were fucking assholes, and the absolute worst. I mean, yeah, a big part of it was because of the whole slut-shaming incident of freshman year, but they never treated me with respect and were always total assholes.
So, when it came to meeting a guy's friends, I was a little nervous. And when it came to meeting Emerson's friends on the first date...I was pretty nervous.
I looked in the mirror, making sure that I wasn't walking around with major sex hair or anything.
I'm going to fast forward through the whole meeting the friends thing. Basically, after politely telling me that I shouldn't feel pressured to smoke, and asking me permission (okay, I thought this was cute) if he could smoke, Emerson and his friends smoked. I sat there, trying to be the cool, breezy hot girl, and talking to his friends. They all seemed to really, really like me, and to think that I was this bad ass bitch.
As the room filled with smoke, spontaneous, ya girl started laughing--uncontrollably.
I have only smoked once in my entire life. It's this infamous story about how I was extremely drunk in a bright red leather miniskirt, standing on a balcony, at a frat house in the straight-up hood. And as I took a hit out of the shadiest weed in the entire world, young Elizabeth Bui decided that she fucking hated it, and then threw it off the balcony, where it landed into the bushes. I have never seen guys run faster than in that exact moment.
"Are you okay?" Emerson asked, looking at me. I continued laughing uncontrollably, and swaying awkwardly back and forth. And then kept on laughing, non-stop.
"Blair?"
I managed to stifle my laughter for approximately three seconds, before I managed to blurt out, "Yeah, Emerson?"
"You're high," Emerson said, laughing. "You're definitely high--I told you that you'd get contact high."
-
I walked into Emerson's room for a second, as I needed to get a breath of fresh air. After being in his room by myself for like, six seconds, Emerson showed up.
"What's up? Everything okay?"
"Yeah, I just wanted to get some air." I admitted, as Emerson laid down on his bed.
"Some fresh air, huh?" It was pretty obvious that the entire living room was clouded and blanketed in cannibis. Emerson laughed for a second. "Come here, Blair."
I pointed at the jacket from earlier, and laughed (please note that I was definitely still high). "I want this."
"Everyone wants that girly-ass jacket," Emerson said. "Everyone."
"You should give it to me."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah, it's my birthday Sunday, remember?" I said, laying on the edge.
"That's a pretty good reason."
"Move over," I laughed, as Emerson gave me a sly-ass smile.
"You come closer," Emerson said, as I started to roll off the bed. Yes, ya girl was so high that she had seemed to have lost motor control, as I rolled off Emerson's damn bed, and my body hit the carpet. It was a face-plant even more epic than Cher from Clueless.
"Come pick me up," I laughed, as Emerson laughed from on the bed.
"I got you," he said, pulling my arm upwards. I forget how I ended up on the bed, but somehow I did.
"So you're going to give me that jacket?" I asked, laughing once more.
"You really want it? I'd rather get you something else for your birthday." I looked at him, to see if he was serious.
"You're going to get me something for my birthday?"
"Yeah, I will."
"And this isn't some bullshit where you're just saying so and you don't?"
"Nope, I'll get you something."
I was genuinely impressed, and for a brief second I felt bad that Emerson and I had started hanging out so close to my birthday, I mean, that's kind of awkward.
"You're hot," I said back. I don't know what possessed me to say that, but I did. Stupid, high, cannibis injected Elizabeth Bui. Apparently I couldn't control my mouth, or my motor skills at that point.
"You didn't hear me," I responded, as I pulled the blanket upwards.
"I did," he whispered, "You said I was hot."
"NO I DIDN'T!" I pulled the covers over, and was basically hiding at this point.
"You're cute as fuck," Emerson said, "But I definitely heard you."
"Speaking of my birthday, you should come next week to my birthday bar crawl."
"Yeah, Blair?" Emerson asked, wrapping an arm around me.
"Yeah, I'm going to look cute as fuck in my sparkly skirt, and my friends are gonna be there..."
"Alright, I'll be there," Emerson said.
"Ali is gonna be there too," I laughed.
"You have to be honest with him or else you're going to end up sucking his dick for that internship."*****
"Nah, he'll be okay."
"Leading him on," Emerson said, laughing.
-
Okay, so I don't really remember how we got in between each conversation, but I remember segments and me laughing because I was so damn high.
***REMEMBER that we were fucking high and I couldn't shut up.
-
"You just have to feel sparks and attraction for someone, you know what I mean?" I said, as we laid there, on his bed.
"No, yeah, I get it."
"It's like there's so many types of love out there, and you can't define love based on what someone else feels. Because every love is different. You can only base it on what you feel."
-
"It's harder dating being the girl," I said, as we cuddled on his bed.
"Definitely harder being the guy, it's so easy for girls to meet people."
"Yeah, but it's harder because guys are shady. Girls have to watch what they do, like they can't fuck someone because then the guy won't want to date them and shit like that. That's why people say not to fuck on the first date."
"It's not the 1960's anymore, if you both want it, it's fine. You know, it doesn't even really change things."
"Plus, so many of my friends think the guy doesn't want to date them because they had sex... but that's not the case. If the guy was shitty before, sex isn't going to change that."
"Yeah, but girls change their minds and girls are shady too."
-
"My friends say I date like a guy, every guy I've dated have been like 'what are we?' but I don't really find the need to define things, as long as you're both into each other and enjoying each other's company. I mean, things define themselves over time, and there's no need to rush, if you just wanna enjoy things."
"Girls actually never want to date me," Emerson admitted, as we laid there.
"Really?" I asked.
"Yeah, they never seem to do."
"I find that hard to believe," I responded.
And the crazy thing is, for the first time, in a long time, your favorite sassy ass man eater actually found herself liking someone. Genuinely liking someone.
-
"Were you just trying to smash?" I asked, as we laid there.
"No, I just thought we were going to eat dinner and hang out."
"Really?"
"Yeah, if I just wanted to smash you I wouldn't have cooked you dinner or watched the whole movie and chilled like this... I would have just smashed you, and not put in all of this effort or time," he responded.
-
We laid there, and Emerson looked at me. He just looked at me, in a way that I hadn't been looked at, in a long, long time. He had a habit of looking at me, as we laid there. And it was nice, and I loved every second of it.
"What?" I asked, staring back.
"I'm just looking at you...is the silence between us weird?"
"No, actually, it's just there. It's calm, and chill. And I ask, 'what?' because I didn't know if it was weird for you."
"I can vibe people by how silence is between us, if it's weird or not."
-
"You know, I'm glad we're in here hanging out," Emerson said, "I'd much rather be chilling in here, than out there getting drunk and getting high again." Emerson paused for a brief moment, and turned to look at me. "I haven't had a decent conversation in a while."
There was a brief moment of silence between us, not a weird kind of silence, but a calm, chill, comfortable silence.
"No, me either. I haven't had a decent conversation in a while either," I admitted. And as I said those words, there was this undeniable feeling I felt. The soft beating of my heart, and the undeniable attraction between the two of us. I had thought that Sally was wrong before, and that there was a fat chance that I would like Emerson.
But I did.
We laid for a little while, until we decided that it was time to get ready for bed.
"Can you give me a shirt to wear?" Emerson walked over to his closet, and picked out a navy shirt.
"Can I wear that mint green shirt?" I said, with my cutest smile. I pointed to the shirt, hanging in his closet.
"But this shirt's going to fit you better!"
"But I like the mint green one!"
Emerson shook his head for a second, and then handed me the shirt. I put it on, over my bra. It ended at the very end of my mid-thigh, and it definitely looked scandalous on me. I wrapped my arms around his neck, as he wrapped his arms around my waist.
"See?"
"You do look good in it," Emerson said, as he leaned in for a kiss. As I walked in front of him, out his door, he gave me a little slap on my ass.
"I need to wash my face," I commented, as I looked at myself in the mirror.
"Here, use my facewash. It's really good, and it's Korean," Emerson said, as my jaw fell straight to the ground. He was using Korean skincare products.
Could he be any more stupid perfect?
I washed my face, as Emerson brushed his teeth, and got ready for bed. Once he got to the room, I was already laying in bed.
"You know, everyone always wants to wear that shirt, but you're the first one that I actually let wear it."
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