"Sometimes I hate every single stupid word you say, sometimes I wanna slap you in your whole face. There's no one quite like you, you push all my buttons down."
-Pink
-
I looked at the blank page before me, and took a deep breath.
PROS:
- Actually made an effort for once- this time could be different
- Was your favorite person in the entire world, for a long time
- Knows you better than anyone else does in this planet
- Your brother loves him
- Dated for a year and a half
- Get along together extremely well
- Have crazy chemistry
- Gives the best kisses and cuddles
- Can tell in .2 milliseconds if you're upset
- Knows how to make you very happy
- Has stuck with you through bad times
- Knows everything about you
- Sexually compatible
- Perfect height ratio
- Made you smile when he texted you
- Is book smart
- Balanced you out when you were too Blair
- You two have fire
- Has made you the happiest you've ever been
- Knows your food and fashion tastes
- Loves your little quirks
- All the good relationship stuff
- You love(d)? him
- Lives by Jim's
CONS:
- Smashed your heart into five hundred pieces
- Has made you the saddest you've ever been
- Walked away from you after he threw you in a ditch
- Never stood up for you with his asshole friends
- Treated you like shit
- Apparently smells bad now
- Never read your blogs
- Can't even give you a grand gesture
- Does secretly asshole things
- Passive aggressive but calls you passive aggressive
- Gave you back your panties and didn't wash them
- DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING TO YOU FOR MONTHS UNTIL SERENA ASKED FOR YOUR SHIT BACK
- Doesn't communicate
- Potentially, actually, most likely a sociopath
- Could bail again in the future, easily
- Didn't even help you out of the goddamn ditch
- Thought you would be there for him even though he wasn't there for you
- COULD HAVE A NEW GIRLFRIEND
- Wrote on the back of your cute AF Hello Kitty figurine you made him
- Wasn't even remotely jealous when you had rebound sex
- Won't show up at 2 am with a boom box or cupcake
- Did not put in as much effort as you
- DUMPED YOU WHILE YOU WERE STRADDLING HIM IN A LACY BLACK SCALLOPED BRA
- Has stood you up before
- Probably would put his friends before you
- Has a really bitchy sister
- Defends people all the damn time
- Changed the chat colors
- Gets salty when I stop talking to him because he's an asshole, but doesn't actually ever make any effort to talk to me, because he's an asshole. And then sends salty passive aggressive messages and then writes more passive aggressive messages on cute Hello Kitty figurines that I make for him, and then sends more passive aggressive messages when all he had to do in the first fucking place was send a normal message OR show up at 2 am with a boombox outside of my fucking apartment.
- Annoys you even when he is not in your life
I looked at the notification, and saw that he changed the chat back from pink to blue. He was annoying me, and he wasn't in my life.
I honestly contemplated messaging him- to the point where I wrote out a message and then deleted it. Because I promise to blog honestly about my life, I will now paste the message that almost made its way to Chuck's inbox.
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